Now going to an all White girls school until I was 18, meant that I didn’t date at ALL up until that point! Thus after 18, when I first started dating I began by just going out with any guy I thought was attractive and made me laugh….the criteria was pretty low and I was an optimist…I’d perpetually give anyone a chance if they appeared to have a good heart and could hold a conversation……FAST FORWARD……

Today I find myself in what I am afraid may be an extremely premature MID-LIFE CRISIS!!! Unfortunately after dating a few bums and a few assholes I have come to realise that STANDARDS HAVE to be set….. so I did……I’m a pretty girl and my bod (body), though not what it used to be, isn’t awful…so I figure I deserve someone who looks good, smells fresh and has all his OWN teeth! Rite??……. I’m also not a retard…contrary to what some may believe ;P, I have a good education and ……..though this whole move to New York isn’t going exactly to plan I have a full time job and a few pennies to rub together, not to mention my own hole in the wall where I sleep and eat….

Thus I have a some other pre-requistes….any one I choose to date must also possess those attributes:

1- A good education

2- A place of their own (over the age of 25 living with your mother is just NOT good enough….I don’t give a rats behind if your “stacking” …..find a way to move out…I don’t need no1 telling me to “be quiet, my mum has work in the morning,” mid session… you zimme)

3- A full time JOB, preferably a career…

Anyhu…….unfortunately despite the fact that I’m in NY I still can NOT find anyone I deem to be worthy of dating ….Is it just me or are the nice looking guys undercover Gays,  and the most intelligent, socially inept, and the other in-between just not doing it, like there’s NO chemistry!!

I have come to find myself asking the question: Should I be Single or just Settle?…..

Settle for a guy that isn’t all that cute but has charisma and a good job…..or a guy with the best look ever but only has 3 topics he really understands (football, sex and food)…….I have heard women say this when they get to 40 but I’m early 20’s and it’s starting to hit me already……Is it me or did are intelligent good looking Black men as rare as Diamonds now-a-days??

The question is should we just give up and come to terms with the fact that we may be single and chaste (non-sexually active) for the rest of our lives or should us women just settle for the next best thing….should we lower our criteria for the sake of companionship?

Personally I’ve taken a vow of celibacy as I feel that no matter how horny I am I shouldn’t just give it up to any old Tom, Dick or Harry….MEN HAVE TO WORK FOR THIS ISH…….. and I’m still in two minds as to whether I am going to open my heart to another relationship, since the last one was apparently a WATE of 3 years….and caused me to lose someone that could have been the one!! Yea It’s emotional…but that’s life!

You see the real problem is that I’m honestly quite bored on Sunday – Wednesday evenings…… and a dude mmay come in useful……as my friend says….Single Sundays are NO Fun….Single Saturdays on the other hand are a whole different ball game…..

Anyhu I want to know what mi amours think….ladies is it just me? And fellas….Do you have the same problem??